Hello. As you might know, the type of topics that I cover are not particularly lighthearted or humorous, but I want to briefly talk about something that is near to my, let's say, heart, and that is Chapstick. Specifically, why there isn't enough types of lip balm. Not in the sense of flavors or numbers, although that could be the case, I don't go roaming store aisles looking for Chapstick because, ya know, Amazon, more why there are not enough good types of Chapstick. 

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So first, I'm not going to tell you the history of Chapstick because that would be a waste of time, even though you probably are wasting your time on reading about Chapstick, which, good for you!

For the most part, Chapstick comes in singular boring tubes, like the example above or near, I don't know how the pictures will play out. Or, if you're lucky, you could find the egg shaped Chapstick. The problem that I have right now is that these Chapstick's are ABSOULUTE GARBAGE. They only help your lips for like 8 minutes and then you're screwed again. Plus, these crappy Chapstick's are full of bad ingredients and are definitely not natural. 

With the exception of one glorious shining star: Burt's Bees. 

Burt's Bees are the Barrett Jackson of Chapstick. They are objectively the best. Vitamin E and Peppermint make them shine. The beeswax in the lip balm makes the protection form chapped lips last much longer than the boring and terrible other Chapstick's. Which brings me to my point: THERE ARE NOT ENOUGH CHAPSTICKS LIKE BURT'S BEES. More companies need to make good Chapstick. Use beeswax or whatever, something that doesn't me go, "Huh, I just threw $12 into a paper shredder for buying these licentious lip balms. Conclusively, to all the companies who are probably not reading this, make better Chapstick, throw away all the junk you idiots keep selling and do better. Local sellers are nearly at the crest of Chapstick perfection. It's time for the masses to get the right balm. 

That's all from me. I'll be back in the next few weeks with a more depressing story, probably covering housing cooperatives or the economy of Lichtenstein; something like that.